Real Life

                                                      RANKINGS  



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1. Madame Guillotine - Score = 3.5    Tier = Bad

Attempts to Beat - Siding with the Aristocracy: 3
Attempts to Beat - Siding with the Revolution: 1

As I begin this historically driven gamebook series from authors Simon Farrell and Jon Sutherland where we get to visit some of the great conflicts in our history, I can't help but be reminded of the "Falcon" series, which was a set of time-travelling gamebooks that while set in the distant future, also allowed you to use your time machine in order to visit different eras of history. Being something of a history buff (and I once found out rather embarrassingly that this term does NOT refer to someone who enjoys reading about history while naked), I greatly enjoyed those sequences, and as such was delightfully anticipating an entire series based around the concept of experiencing famous moments in time. Our first stop in time is France in 1789, or in other words, the French Revolution, where we get to play as aristocrat Phillipe d'Auvergne, who also serves as a captain in the King's Army. This book does something similar to the "Horror Classics" series, in that it provides two separate adventures, and you decide early on with which side of the conflict you wish to cast your lot, by either remaining loyal to the monarchy and aristocracy, or by joining the revolutionaries. I will review each of the two adventures separately below, but first, the game system....

The system here is something of a hybrid between the skill-check styles and combat styles. You begin by having 50 points to allocate as you wish among your attributes of Strength, Agility, Luck, Persuasion, Firearm, Swordsmanship, and Horsemanship. I always greatly prefer these skill allocation systems as opposed to random starting stat generation, so was very happy to see this. At various times during the adventure you will then be asked to test one these attributes by rolling two dice, with you needing to roll equal to or under your value for that attribute in order to pass the obstacle successfully. However, there is a combat system here too, and depending on the weapons being used, you and your opponent will take turns rolling against either your Firearm or Swordsmanship attributes to see if you are able to hit the other, and if so you get to mark a Wound against them, with whomever reaches their given maximum Wound count first thus losing the fight and dying. (Your personal initial Wound maximum amount is determined by dividing your Strength attribute by two). This is all very simple, yet effective, and I was quite pleased with the setup here. Well, with one exception. There is a really dumb inclusion in the combat system, whereby if at any time in the fight either you or your opponent rolls double 1's, it is a killing blow and they then win instantly. Jeesh. Thankfully I was never burned by this during my playthroughs, but I can speak from experience with other books how infuriating it can be to have plotted out your strategy and/or your route perfectly, only to lose because of one single roll, and I really wish this rule wasn't here. There is an additional optional rule whereby you can elect to halve the skill you are fighting with (making it much more difficult for you to hit your opponent), with the trade-off being that you also get to halve their skill as well, which obviously also makes it more difficult for them to hit you. This could come in handy should you encounter an enemy with a greater fighting skill than yours, or should you find yourself in a combat where you only need to just survive for a certain number of rounds. Once I was brought up to speed on this, and had all my points allocated, I was ready to begin.


Siding with the Aristocracy - This was the first side I chose, as based upon all the information I was given in the introduction, I had at this point no reason to abandon my post and attempt to overthrow the King, who I also presumably have taken some kind of oath to protect. And while being told that the grievances of the common people at the moment are proposed new tax laws, I had yet to hear of any overt heinous actions perpetrated by the aristocracy. Upon choosing this side however, I immediately commit a heinous action myself, as I am told I fire into a crowd of onrushing commoners and kill several of them, including women and children (WTF??). From there, Phillipe has his own group of soldiers under his command, and in the coming weeks he attempts to maintain order by preventing a raid on an armoury, and also to help defend against the subsequent storming of the Bastille, which ultimately proves to be futile, and sees you barely escaping with your own life and with the strength of your military unit greatly reduced. During a lull in attacks by the revolutionaries, you learn of the death of your father, and return to your estate outside Paris to help your mother maintain legal control over your home. Upon eventually being recalled back to Paris, you return to find the situation hopeless, with the takeover of France by the revolutionaries now all but inevitable, and you have no choice but to abandon your post and try to escape the country, as the mob is arresting and executing aristocrats such as yourself.

This then sets up what is the best part of the book (and the only good one really) playing on either side of the conflict, and that is your escape from first Paris itself, then France altogether. You manage to locate a group of aristrocats such as yourself (a group that also includes women and children) that are currently hiding out within a small house in Paris, and as they have contacts that they claim can get them first to the port city of Calais, and from there on to England, you elect to join them. As overall poor as I thought the book was, credit where credit is due, the sequences from here to the end are at least infused with a good deal of tension and intrigue, as you never know who you can trust. Even people seemingly helpful to your cause may only be doing so in an attempt to trick and capture you. That isn't to say this stretch isn't without problems either though, particularly when it comes to once again making your character out to be a horrible douchebag. The biggest example of this occurs once you reach Calais, and head off alone to meet your contact there in order to learn of the rendezvous time and place of a ship that will be coming to pick you and your group up off the beach. A sequence then follows whereby you reach your contact's house, and soon learn that a revolutionary has gotten there before you, and is holding a gun at the head of your contact's teenage daughter. You are then given two choices here, one of which sees the teenage girl shot point blank in the head while her father looks on. Look, I'm not against showing the horrors of war and all that, but did they really need to have my character continue to badger the girl's father regarding the rendezvous point mere moments after having witnessed the murder of his daughter, while he cradles the body no less? Once you get the information you need, you do make an attempt to convince the man to come with you, but instead he chooses to remain, and commits suicide as you walk out the door. To make matters worse, had you chosen the other option for dealing with the revolutionary, the girl is momentarily saved as you shoot the intruder dead, but then the father tells you that his comrades will have heard the gunshot and will now be on their way, and combined with what the revolutionary said earlier, he and his daughter are likely going to be executed for helping you, and why they do not come with you at this point I have no idea. So no matter what you do, this man and his teenage daughter are dead for trying to aid your escape, but as long as YOU get away I guess is the main thing! 

This half of the book then concludes with a final fight on the beach with yourself and another member of your group pitted against several revolutionaries that have tracked you down. Giving some more credit where it is due, I found this combat to be very well balanced, and for me it came right down to the end where I found myself just barely surviving with one Wound left to spare. I also needed to take advantage of the optional rule mentioned earlier that makes it tougher to hit your opponent but also tougher for them to hit you. Because for this final combat you do not need to outright win, you only need to survive for a set number of rounds (before help from the boat arrives), this then seemed like a no-brainer course of action. Although there is a Luck check right before this combat that actually seems to me like it would be better if you failed it, overall I found this sequence to be well planned and laid out. That said, I thankfully never fell victim to the "if your enemy rolls double 1's you instantly lose" rule, and I can picture someone running into that here and being completely incensed by it. Once you survive the required number of combat rounds, the men from the boat arrive to beat off your attackers, and you get to sail away to England, with your character thinking about all the innocent people who gave up their lives so that you could escape. Funny, as a reader I was thinking the exact same thing.      

So, this should have been the side of the book that drew some sympathy, because as Phillipe himself points out, it is not his fault he was born an aristocrat, and should they all really be executed just for that? However, that angle is thrown out the window, because the character you play as on this side of the book comes across as a completely despicable person. From firing on women and children in the opening, to totally abandoning your mother to her fate (you never find out what happens to her once you flee, nor does your character even think about her again), and from getting a man and his young daughter killed, and all you can think of all along the way is your own self preservation. In fact, I am hard pressed to recall any action you take throughout the adventure that shows any hint of honor or altruism. Even when you decide to aid the group escaping from Paris, you are only doing so as they have a contact you can take advantage of and you feel it gives you personally the best chance of escape (and also additional older and slower people for the revolutionaries to shoot at instead of you of course!).   

The gameplay aspect doesn't fare much better. There is almost nothing to do over the first half of this side of the book, and you can find yourself on long stretches where no decisions need to be made. Oftentimes, even when you are required to make a decision, it turns out to be meaningless. For example, right in the opening crowd sequence you are rushed at by one of the commoners, and are asked if you want to shoot at him with your pistol or cut him down with your sword. Regardless of which you decide, you are sent to the exact same section one page turn later, with no rolls required to be made. You aren't even provided any sparkling narrative depending on the choice, as the outcome is told to you in one sentence before sending you on to the next section. It's either: "The ball strikes him squarely in the chest and he falls to the ground. Go to 123". Or ...."With a carefully aimed blow you floor him. Go to 123." The adventure has many "no-decision decisions" such as these. Another moment sees you get a letter from your mother and you must decide whether to return to her at your family estate or remain in Paris. Choose to remain in Paris? Too bad, the book sends you back to your estate anyway. Cripes. There are skill checks scattered about here and there, but they are pretty forgiving, and unless you fail a couple of them back-to-back, you shouldn't have much to worry about. The adventure at least ended with a nice final fight so there is that, although this might just be me being glad there was finally something to do for a change. 


Siding with the Revolution - So would this half of the book fare any better? No, no it wouldn't. My review on this half will be shorter, as you repeat most of the story beats found in the Aristocrat side of the book, just from the other point of view. You begin here by ditching your uniform in the opening and then joining the mob of commoners. From here you participate in the raid on the armoury that you attempted to prevent when playing as an artisocrat, but this is over very quickly as one passed skill check and it's done. After that, you once again are railroaded into returning home to your estate after your father dies, and after possibly flat out murdering a man who had really done nothing wrong while he sleeps, and being allowed to continue on, you then return to Paris to rejoin the revolutionaries. At this point of the adventure in the other half of the book, you had joined up with the group of aristocrats trying to escape, but here you are tasked with first uncovering them and then tracking them down. Already knowing where this group of escaping aristocrats was located and what their plan was gave me a big leg up here, as none of that changes between the differing roles you can play in the adventure. They are still hiding out in the same house, still plan on escaping through the same gate, and still plan on being rescued from the same beach. I think this probably should have been changed up at least somewhat for those that played the aristocrat side of the book first, as I was extremely confident in all my decisions regarding how to pursue them, knowing exactly where they were at all times. Even with all that foreknowledge though, you still can't stop the group from escaping the city, as the book needs them to make it to the beach for the conclusion. So off you go into the countryside, chasing after them towards Calais. 

As you hunt down the aristocrats, your character starts to resemble something of a cross between Javert from "Les Miserables", and the Terminator. You relentlessly and without remorse pursue the group (which is once again made up mainly of women, children, and the elderly) with such intense fervour that I started to feel like a madman. Mercifully, the episode with the man and his teenager daughter isn't repeated here, although you can find yourself killing one of the elderly escaping artistocrats who has been wounded and left behind by the others, along with the peasant that was tending to him. When you finally catch up with the escaping group on the beach, you unfortunately do not get the intense fight that ended the other half of the book, and instead only need to pass a couple of skill checks before the group is captured and you win. Once this is done, you turn away, happy to be sending this group (which again, includes women and children), back to Paris to face certain execution and the guillotine. Quite a feather in your hat! What a terrible missed opportunity to not have the option of deciding to let them escape right at the very end, which would have given the character at least SOME redemption. 

Looking at my flowcharts for both of the two halves of the book, playing as a revolutionary was the much longer path, as there appears to be many more decisions to be made along the way. That said, it is longer for only that reason, as while there may be more decisions to make, there are only a handful of skill checks and a couple of combats (and I believe even one of these could have been avoided) along the way. It also suffers from not having the final battle the aristocrat side contained, nor the paranoia and intrigue aspect from that other half of the book. For these last two reasons, if I had a gun to my head (poor choice of words considering the content here), I would say the aristocrat side of the book was the better of the two, but that isn't saying much. I was also able to beat the revolutionary side on my very first attempt, which didn't do it any favours either.    


This book isn't all that different design-wise from one such as "Prisoners of Pax Tharkas" from the Advanced Dungeons & Dragons series. In both cases, actual gameplay is scant, and because the authors are not allowing you to change the outcome of their respective histories, you are therefore not able to impact the big picture. These settings can still work by telling individual personal stories set within these conflicts, which this book does, but then unlike Pax Tharkas it betrays that by making your character a despicable human being (such as in "Chicago Gangsters" from the Virgin Adventure series). The writing here is also quite spartan for the most part, and overall the adventure lacks the atmosphere and immersion that such an interesting historical era should have contained. Why no King Louis XVI here? Or Marie Antoinette? And while I realize this is supposedly the "Real Life" series, and he is a fictional character, this was a golden opportunity to insert the Scarlet Pimpernel, or at least someone just like him. It only could have added some excitement to the adventure.  


Heck, I would even have settled for "E. Blackadder, Esquire". 
   

Ranking: Ugh. Talk about your inauspicious debuts. Gamebooks that fall short on the gameplay side can still find themselves making it into the OK tier if they prove functional, have good writing which builds atmosphere, and don't contain anything else particularly objectionable. "Madame Guillotine" meets the functional requirement, and having two distinct paths through the book along with different victory conditions is a good idea, but that's about it. I just couldn't get behind or even remotely enjoy playing as this total scumbag, and along with subpar writing and railroady choices, is why I have the score down here. I dearly hope the books get much better than this, lest they risk squandering a wonderful idea for a gamebook series. There appears to be almost nowhere to go but up, but I guess time will tell.

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2. The Last Invasion - Score = 2.0    Tier = Bad

Attempts to Beat: 6

Uh-oh. This isn't looking good folks. Two books into the series and already two in the Bad tier. This is another real shame too as this book is set in an even more interesting period than the previous one, as we find ourselves here participating in the main events of the year 1066 in England, which is the year of the invasion of that country by Duke William "the Conqueror" and of the Battle of Hastings. In this adventure we play as Hugh deBouard, a Norman by birth, but now a landowner in northern England where he has risen up the ranks of his adopted country to the point where he is now a close advisor of King Edward "the Confessor". The story opens with King Edward on his deathbed, and as he has no heirs, he proclaims his most trusted Earl, Harold Godwinson, to be the new King. The new King Harold then also accepts you into his inner circle as one of his most trusted advisors. The situation is immediately perilous however, as there are two other individuals who have made it known that they feel they are the rightful heirs to the English throne, these being King Harald Hardrada of Norway, and Duke William of Normandy, and they will both independently attempt to take the country by force if necessary. The goal here then is to help repel the invasion that comes in the northeast by Harald Hardrada and his ally Earl Tostig (and you do this no matter who you ultimately want to side with), and then you need to choose between King Harold and Duke William as to who you wish to ultimately aid in taking control of the country. 

The gameplay system is identical to the previous book, with the exception of one of the attributes being switched out. The Firearm stat obviously needed to be removed, and it is replaced here by the Javelin attribute, which measures your ability of throwing your spear-like weapon. You are told that when you use the Javelin in combat, it causes two Wounds to your opponent when successfully thrown as opposed to just one Wound that your sword inflicts. It's not very clear how this works though. Do I have unlimited Javelins to throw, or just one and then need to fight with my sword after that? As it turns out, it doesn't really matter anyway, because for most of the combats you are told specifically that you fight with your sword, and therefore don't even have the option of using your throwing weapon. I'm not sure most of the other attributes matter that much either, because there is a stunning lack of gameplay over the first two-thirds of the book, and I now feel somewhat guilty over maligning Madame Guillotine for its lack of same, because this adventure is even worse. 

You spend the majority of the first two-thirds of the quest ping-ponging around between London, Normandy, and your home in Northumbria, and I began to feel like a yo-yo. You frequently act as a go-between for Harold and William, bringing messages between the two or spying on one of them to the benefit of the other, with almost no action happening anywhere despite the long distances you are travelling. For a series that heavily relies on a skill check system, giving you 7 different attributes that could be tested, I came across a whopping TWO different skill checks in my six playthroughs, and both of those were of the same attribute (Horsemanship)! In a classic case of min-maxing, I then knew to assign the maximum values of 12 to my attributes of Strength (as it determines how many Wounds you can suffer before dying, although because your Wound amount is determined by Strength divided by 2 and rounded up, 11 is the ideal value here), Swordsmanship (for the couple of fights you need to have near the end), and Horsemanship (for the skill checks mentioned, but truth be told even these two can be avoided). When it's optimal for the player to have three stats set at 12, and the other four set anywhere between 2 and 4, that is poor game design.  

The gameplay aspect picks up ever so slightly once you get to the final sequences of the book, those being: the repelling of Earl Tostig and his raids on the coast; the Battle of Stamford Bridge (to defeat Harald Hardrada); and then the Battle of Hastings between King Harold and Duke William. You are required to at least defeat an opponent or two over these sequences, and I was ecstatic about actually having something to do for once. Outside of these meager few combats though, the final two battles are some of the most tedious battlefield sequences I have ever played. You are asked a RIDICULOUS amount of times if you wish to join in the fray, or remain beside your leader in the rear of the force. Should you decide to join in the battle, you will likely need to fight some opponent before being sent back to where you would have been had you just remained behind in the first place. The problem is, there is absolutely no incentive to join the fighting, as the outcome of the battles cannot be changed (the Saxons win the Battle of Stamford Bridge and the Normans win the Battle of Hastings no matter what), and all that can happen to you is dying in combat (and why risk having your opponent roll the dreaded "double 1" which spells instant death for you?). So you are far better off just remaining at the back lines and letting the battle play out how it was going to anyway. There really should have been something required of the player here other than just being a spectator. With almost no skill checks and very few required combats, the challenge here is in avoiding any instant deaths that you may come across, and there did appear to be a few more of these present than in the previous book.     

One of the few good things about that previous book was the two distinct paths to victory depending on which side of the conflict you chose to side with. Well, that is completely ditched here. Oh sure, you are asked umpteen times during the course of the adventure if you wish to remain loyal to Harold, or switch over to William, but no matter which you choose, up until the final Battle of Hastings the adventure continues on the same way using the same sections. So what was the point? Because you can be so fickle and change sides so easily, this means that only the final time you are asked who you wish to side with has any meaning. Also unlike the previous book, this adventure heavily implies all throughout that you should be allying yourself with one particular side, that being the Saxons, even though we know this is the doomed side. The book often frames the choices between the two leaders as either you remaining loyal and respecting your oath to Harold, or deciding to become a spy for William. The two men themselves are also given differing treatment, as Harold is held up all through the book as an honorable and respected man, while William is portrayed as more underhanded, and as literally having an "evil grin" at one point. Imagine my surprise then when choosing to remain loyal to Harold before the final Battle of Hastings, only to find out that no matter what you do, you are killed on the battlefield and then reproached for being a traitor to your countrymen (the Normans)! F&#k you book! So yes, in order to "win" this adventure, you need to ignore your oath to Harold, not to mention turn your back on the country that has taken you in and given you so much, in order to become an agent for the invading Duke William. And this is even after the adventure spends so much time guilt-tripping you into remaining loyal to Harold. Wow. There absolutely should have been a way to win along either path. Of course, remaining loyal to Harold you still needed to lose the Battle of Hastings, but you could have survived the battle and been put into some sort of post after the invasion, as it is pointed out that William would go on to appoint several people from the losing side to important posts after the battle in an attempt to mend divisions in the country. 

Probably the worst thing about the book is the shocking lack of meaning to most of your decisions. For example, at a few different points in the adventure, Harold or William can ask you for your advice, and you might have three different courses of action that you can recommend. But guess what? All three choices lead to the exact same section in one page turn anyway! Either you pick the right option and the leader agrees, or you pick one of the other two options and the leader disagrees and does what he was going to do all along, with no reward or penalty for choosing correctly or incorrectly, just perhaps a slight scolding if you didn't choose his preferred course of action. In another example, I once found myself leading a charge across Stamford Bridge only to find it blocked by a single large Norseman, and I was asked if I wanted to attempt to proceed down the bank toward the river, or just stay out of it (are you kidding me?). If you choose to proceed down the bank, you stab the Norseman through the planks of the bridge (something that apparently happened in the real battle) and then lead your men across. But if you choose to stay out of it, one of your soldiers goes down the bank........ and stabs the Norseman through the planks, and you then lead your men across. No dice rolls required in either choice. Good grief! Many times I found myself wondering if this book was originally a piece of historical fiction that one of the authors had written earlier in their careers, then decided to try to make a gamebook out of it by half-assedly chopping it up and adding some section links. This book is even more guilty of the "no-decision decisions" moments than Madame Guillotine was, which is really saying something.    

As far as the story itself, the events of the book encompass the full calendar year of 1066, beginning with the death of King Edward the Confessor on January 5, and ending with the crowning of William as the new king on December 25. The authors make sure to include most of the main events of the year and have clearly done their homework, as they even make reference to the appearance of Halley's Comet which did indeed occur in 1066 (and was seen as a good omen on both sides), and they also make sure to include the supposed quote from King Harold who when asked what he was prepared to give to the invading Harald Hardrada, replied that he would give him "Seven feet of English ground, as he is taller than other men".  This book also corrected something I had a problem with in the previous adventure, and here we actually get to interact with the famous individuals of the time. Overall the adventure is a small step up from the previous in terms of its writing, but still has many spartan descriptions and little in the way of atmosphere, although the artwork does help out greatly in that regard, and I enjoyed many of the illustrations here (there is a somewhat gruesome picture showing the hacked to death Harold on the battlefield). However, and as an example, I don't think I've ever been involved in a shipwreck in a gamebook described in such a bland manner as happens here, and you often find yourself making long journeys that pass by in just a few short sections. You also have a wife in the story, who can at times accompany you, but despite learning the names of a couple of my servants, I don't believe I ever learned the name of my wife!  The small step up occurs in the final two battle sequences, which are conveyed well enough, if still not at a level I would have liked to have seen.


Ranking: I mentioned in the prior book's review that the series had almost nowhere to go but up. Oops! I'm glad I put the "almost" in there. As a gamebook, this is incredibly poor. Almost no gameplay right until the final couple of sequences, with half of the game system ignored altogether, and even these final battles are tedious beyond belief. The adventure also contains boatloads of meaningless decisions right up until the end, and you can even actually find yourself thinking you are loyal to one side but somehow end up fighting for the opposite side in the final battle! One thing it did do was make me want to read up more on the actual historical events in question, but unfortunately it had me wanting to do this WHILE I was playing the gamebook. When you are playing a gamebook and thinking about how much you would rather be reading something else, that's a very bad sign.

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3. Sword and Flame - Score = 0.0    Tier = BROKEN

Attempts before realizing I had better things to do: 50


Talk about your gamebook teases. This entry gets off to such a good start too, but then absolutely sabotages itself in the final act. As with the previous book, this adventure is also set in England, except this time the year is 1642 with the events of the English Civil War about to begin. Our character here is Simon Worden, a simple puritan villager who while having some previous combat experience on the battlefields of Europe, is now a quiet, peaceful, and religious man. Conflict is brewing under the surface of the country though and threatens to boil over, with the matter of how England should be governed divided between those who favour the traditional approach of the king (King Charles I in this case), and those who feel that the common people should have more say and that the country should be governed by an elected parliament. This then sets the sides of the conflict as Royalists vs Parliamentarians (also referred to as "Roundheads"). Interestingly, the adventure also maintains the religious aspect of the divide, which is not something you would probably see in a gamebook these days, with the Royalists being mostly made up of Catholics and the Parliamentarians denoted as being mainly puritans, with even your character commenting about how this is a religious war as much as anything. With our Simon Worden character being a puritan himself, we find ourselves on the side of the Parliamentarians to begin the adventure, and along with many of our countrymen, decide to take up arms against the king. The events here are probably a bit too similar to those of the previous book (ie. help to determine who rules over England) and I wished books 2 and 3 had been split up by some of the other adventures in the series, but that is a minor quibble, and overall here the events taking place are quite interesting as usual.

Two things jumped out at me immediately when I began playing this. First, you have absolutely no say in which side of the conflict you wish to fight for. This is an aspect that has slowly lessened as the series has been going on, with book 1 giving you a clear stated choice and providing two separate adventures based upon that decision, then book 2 giving you a choice, but not really having it mean all that much, to here in book 3 where you don't even get a choice at all. I find this to be a pity, as providing the two distinct paths through the book was the only real strength of book 1 and was something I was looking forward to trying in all the books in the range, but it appears for now at least that the authors are abandoning this aspect completely. You do actually find yourself fighting on both sides of the conflict here, as there is an event that occurs around the halfway point of the adventure that causes you to ditch the Parliamentarians to join the Royalists, but this is completely story driven and you have no say in the matter. The second thing that jumped out at me was the writing, which is miles ahead of that from the first two books, and had me questioning if this entry was actually written by a different author. (Perhaps one of Farrell or Sutherland wrote the first two and the other wrote this one?). The characterization here of both the protagonist and most of the individuals he meets felt very fleshed out and humanized, which is a far cry from the previous adventures that contained so many blank slates. I will say though, that greatly improved prose aside, the adventure still struggles at times with the creation of atmosphere, especially when you visit several taverns and spend most of your time out of doors, but yet you oftentimes feel that you could be just about anywhere. (Doesn't it ever rain in England?) 

Your character starts his journey by marching out with the rest of his fellow Parliamentarians under the command of the Earl of Essex to confront the King's army, and this initially had me wondering if this adventure was going to play out much like the last one did, with you either watching or participating in pointless battles one after the other until you finally endure to the end, and for a little while, this appeared to be the case, and I was preparing myself for a snooze-a-thon. But then the first of two twists happened that I never saw coming. After one of these battles (that ends in an ambiguous draw), a messenger arrives to inform you that the member of parliament for your county has died, and the people have elected you to replace him! This then begins one of the more interesting stretches of the book, as you travel back to London to spend many months serving as your local MP. You then spend several sequences involved in debates, making speeches, and participating in votes within the House of Commons, and while I'm sure some might find this boring, I think it a bold and fascinating decision for a gamebook to take, and it had me wondering what a whole book dedicated to being a politician might look like. Debates, votes, backroom dealings, bribes, threats, scandals, etc. There really isn't all that much on the gameplay front going on here, as most of this stretch is just decision making, but I found myself having to stop and think in several places, as voting your conscience can often be at odds with how the leader of your side of the House, John Pym, wants you to vote, and you can even find yourself threatened with violence should you not comply! 

This part of the book that sees you serving as an MP is ended by the second, and more dramatic, twist in the adventure, which involves an atrocity committed by one of the two factions that ultimately sees you switching sides to the Royalists, although not for the reasons you may think. This twist caught me totally off guard, and kudos to the way the authors had it delivered, as they managed to have it hit home really hard while at the same time keeping it tasteful (something they couldn't pull off in book 1). At this point, our character gets his "Mel Gibson" on, and decides to completely forego many of his religious beliefs in an all-out quest for vengeance, and the manner by which he does this is also well conceived and described by the authors. This actually gives us almost 3 different mini-adventures in one book. We have the boring "join up and fight in battles" opening, followed by the incredibly unique but light on gameplay political middle, and then the final personal need for revenge which comes so close to getting everything right, but is ultimately undone by atrocious game design.   
   
Speaking of the game design, I wonder if someone gave the authors the same critique regarding the lack of gameplay in book 2 that I did, because this book is packed with it by comparison. Your character attributes here revert back to the exact same as those found in book 1, with the Firearms statistic back in to replace the Javelin that was brought in for book 2. With the exception of the time you spend in Parliament, your skills here are constantly being tested, much to my delight. You can't just ignore most of them for the sake of a few either, as almost all of the skills are tested in an unavoidable do-or-die check at one point or another. I was routinely going back and re-configuring my starting skill scores based upon my last playthrough, when I would invariably discover a new route or come across a different check that would allow me past an obstacle. And if a gamebook has you going back again and again to try many different configurations of starting scores, that is usually a great sign. I will say though that that one thing missing here is a mechanic that was included in the TSR published gamebooks ("Advanced Dungeons & Dragons" and "Marvel Super Heroes"), where you either began with, or could earn as you played, Experience points, which you could then spend to aid you on key skill checks once you identified which checks those were. Here though, you are totally at the mercy of the dice even once you have that info, which can get frustrating as always to lose on one single roll, but I felt the authors did a good enough job in balancing the skill checks out that I never felt they were unfair either. There are a couple of very easy combats early in the book (as long as you don't roll a double 1 of course), and then that element is all but forgotten as it becomes a skill check adventure through and through. Or so I thought at least. When I had managed to progress roughly three-quarters of the way through the adventure, this was well on its way to the Good Tier and I was very much enjoying myself. And then.......   

SCREEEEEEECH.....CRASH! That was the sound of the book going totally off the rails. After passing an unavoidable do-or-die Horsemanship roll, you receive your final Wound healing section, and considering what you having coming up next, for this to be the last time you get to heal is just nuts. The authors must have suddenly remembered that combat was still an option for them to use, because in the last stretch of the book from this final Healing point onwards, you must fight your way through the unavoidable listed combats below should you wish to complete the adventure and emerge victorious:

                                           Swordsmanship    Wounds
Roundhead                           8                          3 
Roundhead                           7                          4
Roundhead Officer               8                          4 
Roundhead                           7                          4
Infantryman                          5                          3
Infantryman                          6                          3 
Infantryman                          7                          3
Cavarlyman                          7                          3
Cavalryman                          8                          4

Bugger me! Some of these enemies occur in the same section, and frustratingly the rules for the book do not say how you are to handle combat against multiple opponents. To be fair, the previous two books did not tell you how to treat this either, but it never really proved to be an issue in those as the odd time you needed to fight more than one enemy, their stats were so low that I used the "you must roll against the second attacker but just to parry his blow" variant as it seemed more honest. Here though, you have no choice but to interpret that you should fight them one at a time or you would have absolutely no chance. Even fighting them one at a time, your chances merely improve from "near-impossible" to "slightly-less-impossible". The main reason being, as mentioned earlier, is that there is NO healing to be found over this final stretch of the book! 

As a refresher, combat works by you and your opponent taking turns rolling two dice, and if you score your Swordsmanship score or less, you score a hit and deduct a Wound from your adversary. The maximum Wound score your own character can have in the adventure is 6, and even though you have the advantage of always getting to roll first, you can see from the Swordsmanship scores of the enemies above that you are likely going to take at least one or two hits from everybody you fight. Get hit 6 times total over the course of these combats and it's game over. Heck, roughly 90% of the time when making it this far in the adventure, I never made it past the first four fights! And even if I did it would only be with 1 or 2 Wounds to spare, and with five fights still to get through. The authors either totally forgot to include Wound healing over this whole stretch of combats, or they totally lost their minds. There is even a moment or two where you are told weeks have gone by in the story, but no healing is indicated. Well wait a second, is this supposed to be like the "Cretan Chronicles" then, where after every fight your Wound level goes back up to its maximum? Well clearly not, as there are a couple of points in the adventure before this where you are specifically told that you may restore your Wound amount to its initial level. What this adventure badly needs is some form of provisions system allowing you to decide when you wanted to recover a Wound or two. Not only would this make the book more playable, it would also add a nice layer of strategy in deciding if you wanted to eat one of your precious meals, or take your chances in hopefully making it through one more fight. As it stands though, this is yet another gamebook where I have to completely question whether it was playtested at all. 

I should also note that the adventure is no cakewalk even before these last combats thanks to the do-or-die skill checks scattered throughout, and I would only even make it to this final stretch on about half my attempts, which up until that point I thought was a nice balancing act of difficulty done by the authors, only to then have it completely ruined by this. And oh yeah, there are even a couple more do-or-die skill checks in the middle of this stretch, and reading ahead once I decided to call it quits, there are even a couple of random choices near the end where answering incorrectly equals instant death. Mercy! 

In a way this book reminded me of Sky Lord in that if you stuck with it long enough, you MIGHT eventually get extremely lucky with the rolls to succeed (and if you do, you should then immediately go out and buy some lotto tickets), but no one should have to put in the large number of attempts it would likely take in order to do that. I was able to rack up a much larger number of playthroughs of Sky Lord because one of its unlikely-to-beat combats occurred right at the beginning, thus often putting me out of my misery early. Here though, the stretch is at the end, making most playthroughs a long drawn out process, knowing that you will almost certainly die anyway. Maybe Ian Livingstone actually knew what he was doing all along. "You think that Skill 7 character actually has a chance at beating Caverns of the Snow Witch? Here, I'll slaughter you with this Skill 11 Yeti right at the start so you can go roll yourself up a new character that isn't such a loser. You can thank me later." 


Ranking: What a colossal shame. I am left with the odd case of having this entry be much better than the previous two books, yet I have it with a lower score due to a massive late game design goof. This adventure was easily on its way to the Good tier until the final stretch saw it plummeting into the Broken tier. The problems here could be so easily fixed too. This book has me thinking there should be some kind of "gamebook doctor" out there who takes adventures that could be so much better with just a bit of mechanical tweaking, makes the adjustments, and then repackages them out as greatly improved products. This book would easily make it onto that patient list.

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4. Through the Wire - Score = 5.6    Tier = OK

Attempts to Beat: 5

Tally-ho lads! I have been looking forward to this entry ever since I began this series, as I believe the WW2 setting (and WW1 setting also while I'm at it) to be one full of possibilities and to also be one I'm surprised hasn't been used much more in gamebooks than it has. I guess the prevailing attitude is that fantasy-set adventures rule the gamebook landscape, which is something I wouldn't mind seeing broken away from more often. This adventure sees us playing as British RAF pilot Alistair Thompson, who is one of the airmen that Winston Churchill once remarked of "Never was so much owed by so many to so few", as Thompson is one of those brave souls that found themselves defending the skies of Britain from the German Luftwaffe airforce during the Battle of Britain. After providing a brief but well described description of the situation the British pilots find themselves in, the adventure doesn't waste any time in jumping right into the action, and you find yourself already in your Spitfire plane over the skies of the English coast right in the first section.  

One of the biggest changes I noticed between this book and the previous ones in the series is that the Wound attribute has been removed here. No longer can you take 5 or 6 hits before dying, and if you get hit even once here, you are a goner. This makes sense though, as just about any fight you can get into will involve you being shot at, which really would be far more deadly than sword play. Should you find yourself in such a deadly gunfight, this probably means you made a mistake earlier, and the book itself even calls this out by hinting that you can, and should, avoid such altercations should you wish to succeed. This therefore becomes much more of a "skill-check" style book than any of the previous entries, which is not necessarily a bad thing, as I have enjoyed many of these style of books before. The mechanic of distributing your starting 50 skill points as you see fit remains however, and this time your starting attributes include: Pilot, Agility, Luck, Persuasion, Firearm, Language, and Driving, and I found almost all of them to come in useful at one time or another. The adventure itself can be split up into 3 acts as outlined below:

1. The Battle of Britain and aftermath - Not the complete battle of course (I would LOVE to see a full gamebook about that!), but the adventure opens with your character and his Spitfire helping to defend the coast of England from an incoming German attack force made up of both fighters and bombers. The encounter itself is told in an exciting manner, with skill checks being made all throughout should you wish to emerge in one piece. Almost all of these skill checks are of the Pilot attribute (not surprisingly), and I don't believe this stat is ever tested again after this opening encounter, which I found to be a shame as I was hoping you would have the option of stealing an aircraft later in the book, which to my knowledge you don't ever have the option of doing. Once you survive this stretch and send the Germans fleeing back across the English channel, you unavoidably find yourself having to bail out of your plane and parachute into the channel. This was a bit odd, as I found myself passing all the Pilot checks, only to still find that my airplane had been damaged somehow, but I guess the book needs you to be captured no matter how well you are doing. And this leads to a bit of a problem I had with this first act, as once you are plucked out of the water by the Germans, you actually have two different sequences in which you can attempt to make a break for it before you even get to the POW camp. The problem is, due to the premise of the book, it is a foregone conclusion that you absolutely will find yourself being sent to the camp no matter how well you are doing in your escape attempts here, so there really is no point in even trying, as you will either end up dead or sent to the camp anyway. 

2. Escape from the POW camp -  Far and away the best part of the book. Once you arrive at the camp (Stalag Luft 14), you begin by learning the layout of the facility and the various means by which you may attempt to escape. There are various other captured airmen in the camp who are also trying to escape, and you are given several options as to which of them you wish to join up with in your attempt to break out. You can choose to either: join a group trying to tunnel their way out under the fence; join with several men hoping to cut through the wire in the middle of the night; or join with yet another group that is attempting to disguise themselves as Germans and just walk out the front gate. Two of these three options prove to be viable, and even should you select the one that isn't, it's not necessarily game over, as if you can pass a couple of skill checks you can still find yourself with the ability to switch to one of the other options. And that is the real strength of this part of the adventure, as a failed attempt does not automatically mean game over. You will likely need to spend some time in the "cooler" (jail), but once released, you can then attempt one of the other means of escape, with varying different skill checks required depending upon your choice. As usual, the authors have apparently done their historical homework here, with the appropriate slang terms and lingo in use at the time being liberally tossed around. I did find it amusing that it is made clear that many of the other captured members of the camp have been there for many months, maybe even years, and yet if you play your cards right, you can find yourself escaping in just a few days! 

3. The run for the border - Once clear of the camp, you are given the choice of making for either Switzerland or Belgium, with one of the two I found being much more difficult than the other, but both once again being viable as the more difficult one eventually links up with the other. While I found this final act to be quite exciting, bringing to mind many of the classic WW2 movies made in the 1960's, the gameplay aspect did seem to drop off quite a bit (as long as you don't do anything suicidal like opening fire on a platoon of German soldiers). You meet up with the French resistance and from that point on to the end of the adventure are just better off sitting back and doing nothing whenever you are given the option to intercede in whatever situation you find yourself in, and then just allow the resistance to pass you along from person to person like a piece of luggage until you reach the coast and escape. The very final stretch here was particularly guilty of this, and you can find yourself in a lengthy sequence of not having to make any dice rolls or even decisions at all, just the continuous "turn to" references. There was a huge missed opportunity here in not requiring you to be the one to pilot yourself back across the channel, with perhaps one more exciting dogfight in the skies required for success. The very last section of the adventure I also thought was a bit of a tease, and while it was well told and had a couple of British officers telling you they wanted you to return to occupied France to aid the resistance, it had me thinking the quest wasn't over yet, only to then have the quest immediately be over. Although perhaps this was intended to set up a sequel that never came. 


Escaping in just a few days had me feeling like Lord Flasheart from "Blackadder Goes Forth"
"If word gets out that I'm missing, 500 girls will kill themselves. I wouldn't want them on my conscience, not when they ought to be on my face!" 


Something I made note of in the previous entries of the series is how much I liked the idea of getting to play on both sides of the conflict in question. Well, perhaps not surprisingly, you are not able to do that at all here, either by choice or by having the story force you into it. In this case however, it makes perfect sense, as having you play as a Nazi was probably beyond the pale for even an 80's gamebook, and as such I am more than willing to let it slide this time and won't hold it against the adventure. The writing, which was much improved in the last book from what came before it in the first couple of adventures, continues to be quite good here, and in particular the characterizations of many of the people that you meet was solid. The plot here is obviously similar to that of Escape From Colditz from the "Virgin Adventure" series, but with both books going for historical accuracy and a WW2 POW camp setting, this is to be expected. In contrast to the Colditz book however, everything here is handled much better, and additionally gives the adventure a certain degree of replayability. It is also a case of "less is more" here, because if my maps are any indication (more flow-charts than maps with this series), this is the shortest book in the series so far in terms of how many sections you need to pass through in order to win.

I'm sorry to say though that the meaningless decisions are still present in several places. There is at least one glaring example when upon being captured by the Germans you are accused of having fired on a man who was parachuting to safety, a serious charge which you know to be false. You are then given two choices. You can either attempt to defend yourself against this accusation, or refuse to say anything except to give your name, rank and serial number. Should you attempt to defend yourself, you are shown that it was some kind of test, and that you are now to be sent to POW camp Stalag Luft 14. However if you refuse to say anything about the matter, you are told you will be turned over to the Gestapo, at which point your character decides to change his mind all on his own and defend himself, sending you to the same section in either case. This kind of thing would be incredibly weak even in a Choose-Your-Own-Adventure book let alone something that is supposed to be an actual gamebook. I may just have to accept this as part of the M.O. of these authors, but I sure don't have to like it!

Ranking: Finally! It goes to show how disappointing the series has been up until now, when one of the books just making it into the OK tier results in a moment of exultation. This book is nothing to write home about by any stretch of the imagination, but it provided me a couple of nights worth of enjoyment in a setting that I very much enjoy experiencing. I really wish we had more gamebooks that used WW2 as a background, as the possibilities seem almost endless. The gameplay here reverts back to the lighter side of things that we saw in the first couple of books, particularly in the final act of the adventure, and the pointless decisions remain an issue (and will probably continue to I'm assuming), but overall this was a fun, if not decidedly intricate, adventure.

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5. Redcoats and Minutemen - Score = 2.2    Tier = Bad

Attempts to Beat - Siding with the Minutemen: 4
Attempts to Beat - Siding with the Redcoats: 4

Aaaaand we are back to the bullshit again. The previous two books in the series showed great improvement in many areas (with the late-game brokenness of book 3 a large exception), so to see the series return to the same level of sub-par writing and poor game design as we got in the first two books is incredibly depressing. In this entry, we are visiting America in the year 1775 to participate in the American Revolution. Being a North American myself, this will likely be the book which I am the most familiar with in respect to its historical events, having learned extensively about the American Revolution in various high school history classes, and was therefore looking forward to participating in these events. Well, that feeling sure didn't last long, as this is surely one of the most boring gamebooks I have ever played. 

Here we are playing as Nathan Deane, a peaceful farm owner located outside the town of Lexington, Massachusetts, who finds himself caught up in the beginnings of the Revolution even though he really just wants to be left alone. One bright spot of the book is a return to what we saw back in book 1, and you are given the very early option of siding with either the Redcoats (the British) or the Minutemen (the rebels), although it is not quite the clear choice that it was presented as back in that first adventure. Also as in book 1, once that decision is made you are given one of two distinct adventures to complete, with differing victory conditions attached. This was far and away the best aspect about that first book, so up to this point we are off to a really good start. But then unfortunately, you start to play it.       

After taking a brief hiatus last adventure, the Wound mechanic returns here, with your Strength attribute determining how many Wounds you can suffer before you die. At this point, I am not the least bit surprised that I could not find any places to heal Wounds all throughout the book, despite the adventure lasting many in-game years, but it was far less of a problem here than it was in book 3, as the combat here is extremely minimal. And as usual you are given 50 skill points to allocate among your 7 starting attributes, and you are then on your way. Breaking up the two adventures below:

Siding with the Minutemen - Clearly the side you are meant to choose, as you will be routinely guilt-tripped into doing so should you try to stay behind when the rebel recruiter comes around looking for men to join the cause. This side of the book doesn't start off TOO badly, as you get to participate in the opening battle of Lexington, and shortly after that, Bunker Hill, with various skill checks required as you just try to survive these opening battles of which the Minutemen lose. At this point I was thinking the book might be another one in the OK tier, but this was a very early assessment, and in teaching me yet another lesson about getting my hopes up, the adventure begins to take a nosedive from this point forward. 

I earlier mentioned the sub-par writing of this book, and that description might even be generous, because this adventure immediately then becomes a tiresome slog. As you travel across New England and experience the many famous battles of the American Revolution, just about everything is presented in such a way as to make you feel like you are reading about the events in an encyclopedia. After the opening two battles, it seems as though the authors immediately got tired of the subject matter and just had you going from one historical event to the next in almost bullet-point format: Then you went to Concord. Then you went to Boston. Then the rebels declared their independence. Then you went to New York. Then you crossed the Delaware. Then you went to Trenton. Then you went to Philadelphia. Then you spent the winter at Valley Forge (this one is particularly glaring, as you would think the story of George Washington at Valley Forge would lead to some interesting moments but no, your winter spent there lasts all of one section!). Then you fought at Yorktown. Then the British under Cornwallis surrendered. The End. There were some sections where I couldn't believe what I was reading, as the events of whole YEARS are condensed down into one paragraph! 

There is a depressing lack of things to actually do over the latter half of this adventure, sometimes involving you making decisions on whether to fight or stay behind, with no real punishment for choosing not to get involved and letting your comrades face the dangers instead. There are a couple of unavoidable combats and a handful of skill checks scattered here and there, but as long as you don't fail a couple of these checks in a row you should be alright. Although I believe one of the skill checks is botched, as at one point you are asked to make a Firearms check, and if you are successful you suffer 2 Wounds (as your musket explodes in your hands), but if you fail the check, your musket still explodes, but you suffer no Wounds. Probably an editing error in getting the section numbers mixed up, but I found it a telling example of the rushed nature of the book in general. So, while the gameplay overall is definitely on the low side, this aspect is not completely terrible. But if I was let down by this while playing as a Minuteman, I hadn't seen nothing yet!   

Siding with the Redcoats - My goodness. This half of the adventure is just awful. First off, if you want to side with the British Redcoats, the means for doing so is somewhat hidden, as you are not given a black and white choice (or blue and red choice in this case) during the opening as to who you wish to side with. For awhile I thought this adventure was going to be something like book 3 in that you would have no choice but to side with the Minutemen. I eventually did find out how to side with the Redcoats, although it took me taking what I felt was a counter-intuitive action near the beginning of the book. I almost wish I hadn't found it though, because the amount of gameplay along this route is completely laughable, with only one required combat and a whopping TWO skill checks to boot. The old "turn-to-itis" rears its ugly head in spades here too, with long boring stretches of textbook-like entries relating the historical events of the conflict. And once again, you are far better off in just staying put and letting your comrades take all the risks whenever you are asked if you wish to volunteer for a raid or scouting party, as there is no incentive provided in doing so. On a frustratingly personal note, this half should only have taken me a couple of attempts, but I found myself dying not once, but twice during the lone combat in this half of the book, thanks to that stupid rule about a double-one dice roll causing instant death should it be rolled against you. Ugh. Just let me get through this already!

You also won't find the "two sides to every story" take like we had in some of the earlier adventures, because boy are the Redcoats really portrayed as the bad guys here. I don't doubt that in the actual war there were atrocities committed by both sides, but you wouldn't know it from this book, as the Redcoats are clearly meant to be the "evil" side. (I thought these authors were British?). I did once again appreciate how some of the illustrations were not shy about showing the horrors of war, even if one of the drawings in the book might contain the worst rendition of a bear I have ever come across. If there is one saving grace to this side of the book, it is in how it concludes story-wise. The endgame involves the Redcoats committing an incredibly despicable action against a remote village containing men, women, and children, where the men are tortured (and what the soldiers are doing to the women is wisely left unsaid, but is hinted at), and at first I was shaking my head thinking the only way to win this half of the adventure was going to be by participating in this atrocity, much like in book 1 of the series (and even that wasn't this bad). Thankfully though, how you actually win is by refusing to follow the orders of your superior officers, and you then need to get a woman and her children to safety before deserting the Redcoat cause and fleeing to Canada. I then immediately seized the opportunity to flee to my bookcase to put this book away as quickly as possible. 


Ranking: An extremely poor and boring gamebook. It's obviously a bad sign (and an indicator that a book is going to wind up in my Bad tier), when I am forcing myself to play a gamebook just so I can cross it off my list and then move on. I had the usual moment of joy I get from beating a gamebook when I finished this one, but it wasn't from a feeling of triumph, it was from a feeling of relief that I didn't have to slog through it anymore. Is it the worst book in the series so far? Well, at least it isn't broken, and the meaningless decisions appear to have been scaled back somewhat, so I give it a slight edge over The Last Invasion, but that is really just splitting hairs at this point. Even for history buffs and those who enjoy learning and reading about the American Revolution, I still wouldn't recommend this one to them. You would be far better off reading a textbook instead.  

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6. Thunder in the Glens - Score = 7.4    Tier = Good

Attempts to Beat - Siding with the Jacobites: 6
Attempts to Beat - Siding with the English: 5


Now this is what I was hoping for. Talk about your improvements! I've been trying to keep my hopes up for the series, but other than book 4 and the first two-thirds of book 3, there really was no reason for me to be particularly optimistic. Having only 1 and 2/3rds out of 5 books leave me with a positive feeling is hardly an indicator of future success. With this adventure though, which sees us playing as a Scottish Highlander in the year 1745, I feel rewarded for sticking with it. (Not that I wasn't going to see it through to the bitter end in any case). In this book we are Dougan MacAndrew, son to Donald MacAndrew, who is the leader of Clan MacAndrew, a smaller clan of Highlanders located along the shores of Loch Rannoch in Scotland. The adventure opens with news reaching us that Charles Edward Stuart, also known as "Bonnie Prince Charlie", has landed on the western coast of Scotland, with plans to retake the thrones of both Scotland and England for his father, James Francis Edward Stuart, who he believes is the rightful Jacobite ruler of Britain. Your own father wishes to pledge the support of your clan to Prince Charles in his attempt to defeat the English, whereas your overriding concern is just the survival of your clan. Staying out of the conflict isn't really an option however, as both the Jacobites (all the Scottish Highlanders who rally to Prince Charles' cause), and the English, take a "you're either with us or you're against us" approach, so you reluctantly lead your clan into battle, as your father is too old to do so himself and remains in your village. Once again you can find yourself fighting for either side, but the English side is much harder to locate in the early going, and it can take a bit of probing to do so. 

Siding with the Jacobites - I also once again found myself initially thinking that this would be the only side you could fight for, as almost all the early options seem to lead to it. Choosing to join up with Prince Charles, you lead your men (numbering around 100 clansmen) towards Glenfinnan to pledge your allegiance to him. Once having joined up, you are told that your clan is too small to form its own regiment, as is being done with most of the other clans, so your clan is awarded the prestigious role of scouting party for the army. From there, you lead your men in advance of the army, scouting out possible battlefields and stealthily eliminating English garrisons should the opportunity present itself. Being scouts however does not mean that you do not get to participate in the major battles of the adventure, as you and your men are expected to contribute there too, which makes your small force feel like the baddest boys on the block. 

The tide eventually begins to turn against Prince Charles though, and after some early victories, it becomes known that the English are now marshaling their forces under the Duke of Cumberland, and his force greatly outnumbers your own. You soon find yourself marching into England itself, in winter no less and with your food supplies running short, and it is around this point that your character begins to seriously question the leadership of Prince Charles, stating the belief that the Prince is either "insane or the worst general you have ever seen". With a feeling of hopelessness descending upon the army as the Duke of Cumberland and his larger force pursues you back into Scotland, many of the Highlanders begin to desert your army, and your own men even wish to do the same. You can actually try and desert with your men and return to your village, but should you wish to see this path through to the very end, you will really need to thread the needle of this endgame in order to survive the wrath of the pursing English army, which is how it should be considering how much the odds are stacked against you. The authors even channel Steve Jackson in one sequence here, by having you fight against a tough pair of English Dragoons as you attempt to get away, but even if you manage to beat them, you die anyway! It is possible to navigate through this endgame in another manner before this though, and if you do manage to survive, you are rewarded with a rather bittersweet but well written ending.

Siding with the English - The much tougher path to find, and requires you taking some very specific actions in the early going. Along this path, Dougan senses immediately that Prince Charles' cause is hopeless, and not wishing to see his clansmen slaughtered needlessly, decides to "overthrow" his own father. This part can be tricky, but once accomplished you are then free to side with the English, and head out with your men to join up with them at Inverness. There, you are made the scouting party for the English army this time (because you know the area so well), and perform the same function as you did while fighting on the Jacobite side. It can be interesting to see the various battles played out from both sides, and you continually need to keep your own men from deserting, as some of them find fighting for the English against their own countrymen to be traitorous. 

This then leads to one of the more interesting sequences in the book, where you convince the English commander to allow you and your men to return to your lands and punish the villages that chose to fight for Prince Charles by burning them to the ground. This is really something of a ruse on your part just to allow you and your men to return home, although you are expected to at least put some effort in following through on the punishment of these rebel villages, lest word get back to the English that you are not doing so, which would be akin to desertion. Here I was once again wondering if I would be killing innocent people (and you can choose to do this), but you can also choose to show mercy and insist that your clansmen not kill anyone, which is much better treatment than they would get if the English arrived to take on the task themselves. It doesn't play out this way however, as your fellow clansmen get overtaken by bloodlust, while you yourself might need to kill in self defense, and your character then quickly becomes saddened and disillusioned by the whole experience. There are finally a couple of different victory situations here, and I appreciated that you could decide your ultimate reward for yourself depending upon how you saw your character. 

Siding with both! - So yes, there is actually a third path through the book, which allows for a combination of both of the above. When initially siding with the Jacobites, you will eventually come to the realization, as mentioned above, that Prince Charles is either insane or incompetent, and his cause is doomed to failure. You are then given an opportunity to desert and either try to head home, or switch sides to the English. Should you attempt to switch sides, you will need to convince the Duke of Cumberland that you are sincere (and the Persuasion attribute really matters here for a change) and have seen the error of your ways. From this point, you switch over to the same path found near the end of the "siding with the English" route, and can continue on from there. This provides a nice bit of both sides of the book (although most of it is still on the Jacobite side), and makes complete sense with Dougan's overriding goal being the mere survival of his men. Incidentally, should you desert from Prince Charles and head home, and succeed in getting there, you are met with one gut-punch of an ending.  


Ok, so I feel like a broken record at this point, but I need to mention it in order to be fair in the review. The meaningless decisions are once again present here, certainly at least when you are siding with the Jacobites. The use of the Persuasion attribute is particularly bad in this half of the book. There are a couple of times as you are travelling along with Prince Charles' army, that you are called into his War Council where he explains what he intends to do next. You can then either agree or disagree with him, at which point you then need to make a Persuasion roll to see how effective your words are. (Why do I need to make a Persuasion roll if I agree with him?). It will then probably come as no surprise to anyone who has played the series that it doesn't matter if you agreed or disagreed with the Prince, or passed or failed the following skill check, as he does what history said he was going to do no matter what. I get that the authors can't (or won't) change history, but this is also supposed to be a game after all, and this just feels like pointless time wasting.  

That isn't to say though that this is present all throughout the book. The authors do much better in regards to the battles you find yourself in during the adventure, as which choices you make during a battle will impact what kind of enemies you have to fight or what kind of skill checks you need to make. During one battle for example, you are asked if you wish to line your men along the left or right side of the battlefield, (I would think the army commanders would have something to say about this. Could soldiers just line up anywhere they want?) with one side of the field requiring you to possibly make a do-or-die skill check before fighting two enemies, and the other side not requiring the skill check, but giving you two slightly tougher enemies to fight. This is how the books should have been laid out all along, and really makes the others seem even worse when you see it done right. 

Another aspect done right that makes some of the previous books seem worse (book 3 in particular), is the subject of Wound healing. In a stunning display of doing it correctly, there are actually regular healing points along the way! Hallelujah!  You are going to need them too, as this adventure does not shy away from combat, with many fights to be had, and with many of them unavoidable. I'm sad to say though that the godawful "roll double 1's and die" rule remains, but I did have to admit there was one section where it was made at least narratively interesting, that being a fight against your own father, who if you accidentally kill means your brother will automatically kill you in retaliation.  

This book returns to the much better writing that we saw in books 3 and 4, and once again I'm left with the impression that the authors are penning different books in the series. Some atmosphere is finally created here too in a few places, as we get to experience misty Scottish moors and windswept battlefields, although there still is quite a bit of room for improvement when it comes to the various villages and forts that you enter, because they are given incredibly little description. What I did really enjoy though was your character's motivations, as it is clear what matters most to him is the survival of the men of his clan above all else, and he puts their welfare before that of the goals of either Prince Charles or the English, or even his own father, and it makes what would otherwise appear to be treasonous actions seem pragmatic, especially once it becomes clear that Prince Charles' cause is doomed. And speaking of Scottish Highlanders, wouldn't a series based upon "The Highlander" movie be a great premise for some gamebooks? Connor MacLeod battling other immortals through the ages! (Just leave the awful "Highlander 2: The Quickening" out of it please.)

 

In keeping with the Blackadder theme which fits this series so well, if your clan had been named "MacAdder", this book might have received a full extra point from me just for that alone. 


Ranking: As usual when coming off a really bad book, it is sometimes tough to know how much of my enjoyment comes down to everything being relative in comparison to that previous effort. That said, this is easily the choicest cut of beef from the cow of this series so far. This is the entry that I felt Sword and Flame was on its way towards being until it butchered its final stretch. In fact, even if it hadn't messed that up, I still think Thunder in the Glens would have been better. It has some of the same problems inherent in the rest of the series, but does a much better job with everything else, providing lots of dice rolling and several different paths through the adventure to experiment with, along with an interesting personal story of one man trying to do what's best for his clan. Well done! 

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7. Blazing Beacons - Score = 2.7    Tier = Bad

Attempts to Beat - Siding with the English: 5
Attempts to Beat - Siding with the Spanish: 4


*Sung to the theme from "Gilligan's Island"*

Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale,
A tale of some dreadful shite,
The authors are now trolling us,
And that just isn't right!


One step forward, two steps back. That should be the tagline of this series. This book begins in 1587, with actually a very good prologue detailing events that have taken place in both the countries of Spain and England in the years prior, and of how King Philip II of Spain (a Catholic country at the time) wishes to overthrow Queen Elizabeth I of England (a Protestant), and install a Catholic monarchy. His best chance of doing this is to see Elizabeth replaced with her cousin, Mary Queen of Scots. However, once a plot to assassinate Elizabeth (endorsed by Mary herself) is uncovered, Elizabeth has Mary executed, and Philip is only left with invasion of England as an option. The book then goes on to cover the events of the sailing of the Spanish Armada in 1588, a fleet of 130 Spanish ships, and of its attempt to deliver a force of soldiers to invade England. Along with the Redcoats and Minutemen book, this was the entry I was looking forward to the most before I began this series, the reason for this being twofold. One, Sir Francis Drake is one of my absolute favorite individuals from history to read about, and knowing that he was involved with the events in question here had me excited to share in his exploits. And two, this book having a naval theme promised a much different experience than the other books in the series, which generally have you travelling overland by foot or horse and participating in various land-based battles and adventures. 

An immediate noticeable difference between this book and the preceding in the range is in how even before the adventure begins, you decide which side you wish to fight for, England or Spain. Depending on the side you choose, you will see yourself playing as a completely different individual altogether. This is in contrast to the previous books which always saw you playing as the same person, no matter which side you found yourself fighting on. Being a naval themed book, I was hoping to see a few new attributes introduced, but unfortunately only one change is made to the standard attributes from the majority of the books, with a Seamanship statistic being subbed in to replace Horsemanship. Breaking down the two separate adventures for review as usual:

Siding with the English -  This is how this half of the book begins, right in the first section: 

Section 1: You are looking for a good tavern in which to spend the evening. Will you try along the waterfront (turn to 61), or towards the town (turn to 203)? 

Section 61 - The taverns on the waterfront are crowded. You head into the town. Turn to 203 

Section 203 - Finding a quiet tavern, you enter.... 


For f&#%$ sake! Now the authors are just trolling us by blatantly throwing this kind of crap in our faces right in the first section! I'd like to say that this is a one-off or that this aspect gets better as you go along, but I really can't. In fact, it gets even worse in the other half of the book, but I will get to that later. It's really a shame too, because the story here is very good. When you choose to side with the English, you play as Sir Rupert Havilland, a privateer captain of the ship "Caroline". You also happen to be a good friend of legendary English captain Sir Francis Drake, and have accompanied him on many adventures in the Caribbean and elsewhere. With war against Spain looming, Drake asks you to join him on an expedition he is putting together, as he has been given a mission personally by Queen Elizabeth herself, to sail to the Spanish coast and to harass the Spanish fleet there and generally cause as much mayhem as possible in the hopes of setting back their suspected invasion plans. 

So you set off from Plymouth as a part of Drake's group of ships, and basically attack anything you come across. There are a couple of interesting sea battles here, which involve you boarding enemy Spanish ships and having to sword-fight your way through various Spanish seaman, and perhaps even the captain of the enemy ship. You also get to (if you wish), participate in the famous "Singeing the King of Spain's beard", where Drake attacks the Spanish port of Cadiz, sinking or damaging many ships without losing any of his own, and completing his main mission of striking a major blow to the Spanish invasion plans. The thing is, as was also seen in book 2 of the series, The Last Invasion, you don't really need to participate in this at all, as you are given the choice of sitting back and waiting on your ship while Drake does his thing. And as Drake throughout the whole adventure can do no wrong, he doesn't need your help in the slightest. In fact, Drake comes across as an absolute boss of a legend here, even in his own time. Every bold plan he makes, (always outnumbered of course), he pulls off with complete bravado, and it is made clear that he is known, admired, and feared not just by the Spanish, but all throughout Europe.      

The first half of the English side was actually going "ok", and I was enjoying wreaking havoc among the Spanish fleet. But once the second half begins, and the Spanish eventually manage to launch their armada toward the English Channel, the gameplay aspect of the book almost disappears. The armada is immediately beset by bad luck and even worse leadership, and you are not really required to do all that much, even the odd time when you find yourself in a battle. There is also a very long stretch in the back half here of "turn to" references, and while the story was generally well told, not having much in the way of gameplay starts to wear thin fairly quickly. The adventure also ends with a whimper, as the armada eventually has to abandon their invasion plans due to a loss of men and supplies, and heads off north along the eastern coast of England in an attempt to circle around Scotland and Ireland on their way back to Spain. Fittingly, the adventure ends by asking you if you wish to pursue the armada north, or volunteer your ship to ferry wounded men back to England, but the second choice just sees you dropping the wounded off, then immediately sends you to the same section as pursuing the armada north (I guess you had enough time to do both!). You quickly quit the chase however, and the last you see of the armada it is heading north towards the east coast of Scotland as they are now just hoping to make it home alive. You then return to England, your mission complete. The adventure then finally concludes with a comment regarding the mistreatment of the wounded English sailors who returned, as it is noted that Queen Elizabeth refused to pay for their care, while also pointing out that King Phillip made sure his surviving Spanish sailors were well cared for. Take that England! (I guess?)   


Siding with the Spanish - This is how this half of the book begins, right in its first section:

Section 2: Will you rush back to Lisbon for your orders (turn to 292), or discuss matters with your father first (turn to 218)?

Section 292: The fleet will not sail for many weeks, so you are in no rush and your father will tell you what is happening. Turn to 218.

Section 218: Your father tells you the fleet is not yet ready to sail, so you spend some time with him before heading to Lisbon....


Ok....they are just insulting us now. I mean, what else would you call this? I'm trying to think of a weaker opening choice for a gamebook than the two that kick of either side of this book and I'm coming up with nothing. ANYWAY....this half of the book sees you playing as Don Jaime Pena, captain of the ship "San Martin", and a member of the Spanish navy. You are called upon by your superiors to head to Lisbon and receive your orders from the Admiral of the fleet, the Marquis of Santa Cruz. Here is where a glimmer of hope actually comes into play, as you can be given one of two different missions from the admiral. (What's this? An actual branching choice with consequences? Well blow me down!). You can either be sent off towards the Azores in pursuit of a Portuguese galleon that the admiral wants to commandeer and have press-ganged into his navy, or you can head towards the Netherlands and bring a message to an ally of yours, the Duke of Parma, instructing him on when and where to send his forces across the English Channel to aid in the invasion. The first option here is actually decent, and involves an attack against the Portuguese ship that can see you either persuading the captain to join you, or failing that, requiring you to defeat him in combat. The option that sees you delivering the message however is exactly as boring as it sounds, and you can find yourself weighing anchor along the coast, dropping off your messenger, then waiting 10 uneventful days for him to return before you head back to Lisbon, mission accomplished. And unfortunately, if you want to win, this latter mission is probably the one you should be taking.    

But boy oh boy, once you finish the opening mission and you then join the armada that is now ready to set sail, the gameplay becomes even worse than it was on the English side. There is yet another streak of "turn to" references here that is incredibly even longer than the stretch found in the other half of the book. And while we have come to expect being given choices that lead to the exact same result regardless, this adventure takes it even a step further, because now it even includes skill checks that don't matter if you pass or fail them! Uh-oh, with things going so poorly for the armada, you have got a mutiny on your hands! You need to make a Persuasion skill check to convince your men to stay the course. Pass the check and you quell the mutiny and can proceed on. Fail the check? Well, then you decide to threaten your crew with violence......and this quells the mutiny and you can proceed on. You couldn't make this stuff up. (Unless you are these authors of course!)

Should you take the more boring courier mission to the Duke of Parma at the beginning, you can beat this adventure without ever having to get in even one combat, which seems like a waste of their whole system. I don't know if the authors realized how short they were on gameplay here, because near the end of the adventure they try to overcompensate by all of a sudden throwing FOUR do-or-die skill checks at you in a row! All this did was lead me to an extreme case of min-maxing, because once I learned which 4 attributes required do-or-die rolls, I set all those scores to 11, and gave the remaining 3 attributes scores of 2 each, as these remaining attributes were either never tested, or they were tested but it didn't matter if you failed them. When your final assigned scores look like that, you know they did a terrible job at balancing the skills. The adventure then ends on a bittersweet note, as while it is explained that you are one of the survivors who make it back to Spain, many of your comrades are lost on the return journey when their ships are wrecked along the Irish coast and they either drown or are killed by the "savage Irish". (I wonder if any Irish players took offense to this?) 


In spite of my numerous issues with the gameplay, the writing I found to be quite good. It was very interesting to participate on both sides of a conflict where one side could do no wrong, while the other side was either cursed or inept (or both). As a result, you feel like a powerful force of nature following an unbeatable leader in one half of the book, and a luckless loser on a grim death march in the other half. The book also hammers home how reliant the naval forces of the day were when it came to the wind, as carefully laid plans are routinely delayed or scuppered just because of an unexpected gale or a quiet windless day. I will say though that you could have one heck of a drinking game in this book, just take a shot every time it is mentioned that you are "running low on ammunition", as this is brought up numerous times in both halves of the book. Despite being constantly told this though, your ships never do seem to run out of ammo no matter how many hours of battle you are told you have just been involved in. I also never came across any seamen with the last name of Stains, so that was a small mercy to be thankful for.    

This whole book had me thinking about just how well the gamebook format could fit a naval style adventure. I can envision a large size gamebook with full stats for your ship that must be managed. I'm not just talking "crew strike" and "crew strength", but a full gamut of stats that incorporates all areas of both your ship and crew (hull strength, sails, cannons, provisions, first mate, etc). The adventure could then take place in any one of many interesting locations, both in fantasy or historical real world settings, and could involve battling an enemy navy, sailing as a pirate, or attempting to circumnavigate the globe. I wonder if perhaps the Fabled Lands books contain something akin to this, but I still have a bit of time before I get to those.  

This book probably lined up perfectly for a shot of Miranda Richardson as Queen Elizabeth I from Blackadder 2, but I just had to go with....

For the rest of my life, whenever I hear the words "Spanish Armada", I will think of this scene from "Billy Madison". 


Ranking: The fact that I enjoyed the story, but the score is still this low, speaks volumes about the gameplay. There were some glimmers of hope for the gameplay in the first half of each side (atrocious opening choices for each notwithstanding), but in the rest of the book this aspect is just awful. I found it tough to not be insulted by some of the design here, that's how poor and half-assed it is (not even half-assed, more like quarter-assed). It takes some of the worst elements from a couple of the previous books: The Last Invasion (far too many pointless decisions; better off just not getting involved) and Redcoats and Minutemen (telling you about the conflict instead of letting you actually DO much of anything). But at least the story and writing here was much better than those two, which is why I have it ranked a bit higher. Still yet another one for the Bad tier though, but at least with only one more book to go in the series there is finally some light at the end of this tunnel.

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8. The Fear Factor - Score = 3.3    Tier = Bad

Attempts to Beat - Siding with the SAS: 6
Attempts to Beat - Siding with the Terrorists (I can't believe I'm typing that): 3


Wooo boy. Well, this certainly was a way to end the series. This entry is so far removed from the rest of the previous books that it feels like there must be some kind of backstory to its creation and how it wasn't originally intended for this series. But I guess if you are going to introduce ideas like this, then the last book in the range would be the logical place to do it. This was the one book in the series that just based upon its title, and even its cover, I really had no idea what to expect other than it was set in modern times and apparently in London if the cover was to be believed (and it was). Every other book before this was pretty clear on what historical conflict you were going to find yourself involved in before you even began....but not here. The reason for this may be because the events of the adventure itself aren't actually based around any real events (at least that I am aware of), which makes it a strange inclusion for this series. The book does open with a sobering prologue that includes "A Catalogue of Terror" outlining actual acts of terrorism that occurred during the 1970's and 1980's, with particular attention being paid to acts committed by the IRA (Irish Republican Army). This had me wondering if that was the group that was intended to be used in this adventure before the authors thought better of it and used a different group instead. (You are even told at one point that the leader of the terrorists has a "Northern accent", if that was supposed to be hinting at something).  

With the stage of apparent global discontent thus set in the introduction, we are introduced to Trevor Rowlands, the character we are playing as. Trevor is an unemployed man living in London in what I presume to be either 1987 or 1988 when this book was likely written, and who is just barely scraping by on government benefit cheques. The story begins as we are attending a labour union rally being held at Hyde Park, and we consider joining in an attempt to make our dissatisfaction with our employment prospects known to the government. After attending the rally, we return to our modest ground floor apartment, and strangely enough the means by how we travel back home (you can choose to take the tube or the bus) will likely end up determining what happens next. Depending upon how we get home, we can find ourselves visited by a man from a group calling itself "Direct Action", a terrorist group that intends to use violence to overthrow the government, and hopefully capitalism worldwide eventually. It is at this point where we can decide to accept his invitation to join, or refuse and attempt to report him and his group to the authorities, in this case the SAS (Special Air Service). Breaking down the two halves of the book:

Siding with the SAS -  So if you refuse to join Direct Action and then survive the recruiter's attempt to kill you (or conversely if you just take an alternate route back to your home after the rally), you will find yourself approached by government agents, later revealed to be members of the SAS. It was at this point that for me something unexpected happened, as in my view the adventure starts to become parody. You are brought to a secret SAS hideout, and here the "Basil Exposition" character of the story appears to bring you up to speed on what is going on. Apparently while on a visit to London, the United States Secretary of State, a man known as Simon Mosby, has been kidnapped by Direct Action, and the SAS believes they know where he is being held. As it turns out, your character bears a striking resemblance to a man the government has just captured that was responsible for a recent terrorist bombing on Oxford Street. As it is believed that many of the members of Direct Action know of, but have not met this bomber face-to-face, they want to recruit YOU to aid them in their efforts to capture them. (Hang on, if the members of Direct Action do not know what this bomber looks like, why did the SAS need someone who looks like the bomber to impersonate him?). But that isn't all! Wouldn't you know it, there is a United Nations meeting scheduled at the Houses of Parliament tomorrow afternoon, and with all the leaders of the Western World to be present, it is believed that Direct Action will be planning an attack. The SAS additionally offers you the sum of 250,000 pounds should you be willing to aid them, and being the unemployed individual that you are, you decide to take them up on the offer, even though by your own admission you are likely going to your death.  

From here, it starts to get really crazy, as the SAS trains you in how to use firearms such as uzi's and assault rifles, while also instructing you in the use and disarmament of high explosives. Oh, and they teach you all this in half a day! (You even get a break for tea!) I guess that's just how the SAS rolls man. Once you receive this training, you are ready for the field. The first thing you need to do is rescue Mosby, single-handedly of course, from the luxurious townhouse where the terrorists are currently holding him. This sequence has some decent intrigue, and involves a tricky shootout with the terrorists before you are able to rescue the beleaguered Secretary of State. Once this is done your SAS contact arrives, and after a search of the townhouse, the final plan of the terrorists is uncovered. It seems they intend to blow up the Houses of Parliament precisely at 3 pm the next day when the Prime Minister is set to take the stage for a speech! I'm a bit unclear as to why the terrorists needed to kidnap Mosby if this was the case, seeing as how he would have been present at the Houses of Parliament and wiped out in their planned attack anyway, but I think the whole Mosby angle exists just to give you the preceding action sequence. Still, in spite of the fact that we have done our part and earned our 250,000 pounds, we decide we aren't going to miss the big showdown, so count us in on the mad dash to Parliament to stop the terrorists with the 3 pm deadline fast approaching. (Don't we have enough evidence to have them call off the meeting?). To be fair, you can actually choose to stop here, take your money and walk away, but if you do this then you can't "win" the adventure. It is at this point that your character also starts trading quips with his SAS contact, which just reinforced the action movie parody feel of where this was going. In fact, I was somewhat disappointed that no one ever uttered the line "I only had two days to retirement". 

What follows is easily the best part of the whole book. Once we arrive at Parliament, along with a dozen or so other SAS agents (and despite that we have only been with the SAS for a day, we are actually put in command of other agents at one point here!), we have two options to choose from. We can decide to head up to the roof to see what we can spot, or we can decide to search the underground car-park. Which one we decide to do will effect how the endgame plays out, with one of the options leading to Westminster Bridge where the terrorists have set up the detonator to trigger the explosives that they have planted, and the other option leading to a final shootout with the last remaining terrorists. Both of these paths can lead to victory (whichever action you don't take, the other SAS agents will succeed in taking care of), and require some do-or-die dice rolls along with a tricky combat, with each of these paths containing different challenges. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying this final sequence is great by any means, but compared to the rest of the book, it stood out to me as the most enjoyable part. Once this is complete and you have helped save the day, you finally get to walk away with your hard earned cash and a hearty thanks from the government, along with the hint of a possible job offer to become a full-time SAS agent. (I guess in case another group of terrorists decides to steal some nukes tomorrow.) 


Siding with the.....(sigh) terrorists - Should you chose to accept Direct Action's offer to join them near the beginning of the adventure, the grimness that was found in the prologue is maintained all throughout this half of the book. At first I thought the authors at least had the good sense (if you can call it that) to make up a fictional terrorist group, but a little online research led me to discover that Direct Action, or "Action Directe", was indeed a real terrorist organization that operated in France during the 1980's, and who were responsible for committing at least a dozen murders and carrying out almost a hundred bombings. Yikes.  

With that cheery thought in mind, the leader of the group brings you to his camp hidden in the countryside where you are introduced to the other 10 or so members of his terrorist cell. Once again you are given a crash course in how to use automatic weapons and handle explosives, but this time it felt much more grounded in reality. When that is complete, you then have two set-pieces to participate in (although the first one can be completely missed) just like the other half of the book. First, you are among the group that kidnaps Simon Mosby, as along with your comrades you ambush his motorcade, murdering everyone except for Mosby himself (who it is implied is then tortured back at your camp). From there you head on to the endgame where you attempt to detonate the explosives the group has already planted at the Houses of Parliament. This end sequence flies by much faster than it did when siding with the SAS, although there are a couple of mass battles you can find yourself in that pit your group of terrorists against a larger group of SAS agents, but these can be easily bypassed or missed altogether. Once you pass the final skill check and succeed in triggering the detonator, you are "rewarded" with a massive explosion outside the Palace of Westminster, and even though you are told you did not succeed in killing all the heads of state, I still presume you kill dozens, if not hundreds, of people. The adventure then concludes with you standing on the edge of the destruction as if you were a modern day Guy Fawkes, because "terrorism, for you, is an extension of the will of the people."

A visage forever co-opted 

Well, that made me feel dirty. The gameplay doesn't make any of this any better either, although that might have been impossible in any case. Much like the final stretch of the previous book, I found myself not even touching the dice until the climax, when I needed to pass several skill checks in quick succession. There is a fight you can find yourself in at the end where you must defeat 3 SAS agents all by yourself as they assault your position, but because of how combat works in the book, you are unlikely to win this. This brings me to the subject of the combat system in the book in general, which I was not a fan of. Because you are dealing with such lethal weapons at all times, you both kill and can be killed in one hit (sometimes the book is generous and allows you to be hit twice). You have the advantage of usually getting to roll first, but then the book often has you fighting 2 or 3 opponents at once, which means even one single poor roll and it's game over. This was bringing back memories of "one strike combat" from Chasms of Malice, and that ain't a good thing. Thankfully at least, combat can be avoided altogether along the terrorist route, but the SAS route does require you to get in a couple of high-risk fights, which is why that side took me twice as many attempts.        



In trying to view this book through the prism of the time it was written, I can concede that this probably wouldn't even have raised much of an eyebrow in the free-wheeling 80's when it was first published. But as long-time gamebook blogger Ed Jolley noted in the comments section below, it seems very unlikely this would be taken on by any publishers today. Still, as tasteless as I found it, in a strange way I guess I do have to give at least a smidgen of credit to the authors for trying something completely new and different. But that doesn't mean I think it works. Or that I have remotely any interest in playing as a terrorist. I had a similar problem here that I had in book 1, where I found the player character there to be a murderous maniac as well. Call me old fashioned maybe, but I much prefer playing as the "good guy" in gamebooks. I mean sure, I can see the appeal of playing as a vampire or werewolf in a gamebook, but those are obviously fantasy settings and not rooted in the real world such as the terrorist side of this book. That said, this could have been even worse than it was. You don't actually torture or execute anyone yourself (although you condone your comrades doing these things, so you could argue you are just as guilty), at least until the finale when you detonate the explosion that kills who knows how many people (the authors don't say how many die as they probably didn't want to give you a "bodycount"). Perhaps the authors thought setting off a large explosion was somehow less personal and therefore less objectionable than personally executing someone at close range, but that doesn't make it any better for me in the slightest. There is also the distinct possibility that I may be taking this all way too seriously, which is in stark contrast to how I took the SAS half of the book I admit, and I would therefore be very interested to hear others thoughts on this.



Ranking: This has been one of the toughest books for me to score because the two halves vary so wildly, and tonally the book is all over the place. It's not a flat out comedy like "Austin Powers" or anything, but if taken as a violent parody of James Bond movies, which is how I eventually began viewing it, the half that sees you siding with the SAS is actually quite decent. The story is over-the-top ridiculous of course, but the design of this half is one of the better ones of the series (not that that is saying much). It has a couple of different paths through the adventure, with each one requiring you to bypass different challenges. This contributes to making this half of the book seem on the short side, but I found it fairly enjoyable nonetheless, and if I was just giving a score to this half alone, it would have easily made it into the OK tier with a score in the mid to high 5's. Probably not surprisingly though, the half of the book that sees you joining the terrorists is awful in more ways than one. To say I don't enjoy playing as a character who takes delight in blowing up people is an understatement, but the design of this half from a gameplay perspective is pretty rotten as well. Consider this overall score then a "splitting of the difference". It's a great shame the authors didn't just ditch the whole grim prologue, redesign the combat system, and do something similar to what they did in book 4 and just dedicate the whole thing to the SAS side. If they had, and especially if they had gone into full comedy mode, they might have had a really good "Johnny English" style secret agent gamebook on their hands. But I guess for now that gamebook is still out there somewhere, waiting to be played. As it is, we are left with an overall poor conclusion to an overall poor series. 


34 comments:

  1. I remember this being mentioned or even reviewed in WARLOCK magazine.

    Even back then ,it seemed like a bizarre choice of period for a gamebook !

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    1. Yeah, as an adult I very much appreciate the idea (if not the execution of book 1 anyway), but I can't picture too many kids wanting to play these, if that is who they were aimed at in any case.

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  2. For example, at a few different points in the adventure, Harold or William can ask you for your advice, and you might have three different courses of action that you can recommend. But guess what? All three choices lead to the exact same section in one page turn anyway!

    Probably a Jon Sutherland thing, as the Fighting Fantasy mini-adventure he co-wrote for serialisation in White Dwarf has exactly the same issue.

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    1. Well, the same as in' get offered multiple options, have the same outcome whatever you choose'. But it's arguably worse in the FF adventure, as you're leadign the army, so it's not just 'offer advice, get overruled by ruler', it's 'choose what to do, get railroaded into doing what the authors want to happen regardless'.

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    2. Yes, both of the first two books here have the same issue. I briefly wondered if it was done just to pad out the section count to the desired 300, but it is so prevalent that I don't think that is the reason. I really have no idea why he thought that it would be fun.

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  3. I really like the concept of these books but every Jon Sutherland gamebook I've ever played has had meaningless decisions and clunky mechanics. He's not actually a bad writer when he tries, but he can be pretty desperate when he doesn't. Hopefully you'll find a gem somewhere in this series.

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    1. I may have found it! I can already say that book 3 is MUCH better than the first two. Hopefully the start of a trend for the series, but whenever I get my hopes up like that I usually have them dashed soon after. lol

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    2. Or maybe I haven't found it. Book 3 has gone full-on ridiculous in the last act, and now I'm not even sure if the adventure is beatable. I knew I should have finished my playthroughs before making that last comment. Lesson learned!

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    3. I enjoyed book 4 when I played it for my blog, so there is still a glimmer of hope.

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    4. I will be sure to check that out on your blog Ed. I'm hoping you get to play book 3 at some point, would love to hear your thoughts on it. And on the others too for that matter.

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    5. I have the whole series, and do intend to get round to the others, but the majority of the gamebooks I've read that have authorial input from Jon Sutherland leave me less than enthused about the rest of his output. Still, only one more of the books he penned as 'Jak Shadow' before the Sutherland slot moves on to Real Life.

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  4. Hey John, I've just noticed you left a comment on my FF blog way back in January - thanks !

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  5. Pity Book 3 didn't live up to expectations. Book 4 sounds decent, though the final third just makes me think of Allo Allo! Now that would be a fun gamebook.

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    1. And there is even a cafe owner in the book who helps you! I have heard of the show but never seen it. Is it worth checking out?

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    2. Well comedy is pretty subjective. Personally I find it hilarious though it relies a lot on silly puns, catchphrases and innuendo which isn't for everyone. The plot gets incredibly convoluted as it progresses.

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  6. the Redcoats are clearly meant to be the "evil" side. (I thought these authors were British?)
    I look forward to your reaction to the final book in the series. There can't be many publishers who'd dare go anywhere near something like that nowadays.

    I had the usual moment of joy I get from beating a gamebook when I finished this one, but it wasn't from a feeling of triumph, it was from a feeling of relief that I didn't have to slog through it anymore.
    I remember that feeling from when I finally made it through Shinderg's Tomb, the third adventure in the Proteus series. Are you planning on playing them at any point? Variable quality, but there are some enjoyable adventures in there, and only two absolute clunkers.

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    1. Actually yes, I have the Proteus series up next on my schedule after I finish Real Life. There are an impressive number of adventures there for a magazine series. I look forward to comparing with your experiences and notes afterwards. I wonder if I will come up with the same clunkers!

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  7. If you look closely at the cover of Redcoats, you will see that the artist simply copied a still from INDIANA JONES AND THE TEMPLE OF DOOM and then subtly changed it to fit the subject. !

    This was quite a common practice back in the 80's.

    Had they no shame ?


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    1. Hmm, I have to admit, I have been looking at the cover of Redcoats but don't see it. What scene from the movie is it copying from? I also have to admit that Temple of Doom is probably my least favorite Indiana Jones movie. (Yes, even less than the Crystal Skull movie. Sacrilege, I know!)

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    2. Compare it with the image on this page :


      https://www.vitalthrills.com/indiana-jones-and-the-temple-of-doom-a-look-back/


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  8. Excellent and fair-minded reviews, as always! I'm just exploring this series now, and have to say that I want to like them much more than I actually do. They are certainly pacy and snappily written, and I like the fact that there is an obvious effort not to impose contemporary moral standards on to the past - the first choice in the first book is whether or not to fire on a group of unarmed protestors, for crying out loud. (And later on you get no fewer than two chances to murder people in their beds, one of them a sick old man!) Still, the game-system is poorly thought-out and sloppily applied (for all the reasons you note), and the books have an annoying habit of instantly overriding or ignoring any choices you do get to make. I like to think the authors were making some point about the lack of individual agency in face of larger historical processes, but doubt that was their intent...

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    1. Thanks Ben! I was shocked by the results of that first choice in book 1. Things didn't really get much better as you go along either. The game-system also does have me wondering how many gamebooks the authors actually played themselves before writing these. Still, I am naively holding out hope for improvements over the last 3 books. Would be interested to know which book in the series you find the best and which the worst.

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    2. I don't think I've read enough of them yet to reach a judgement, but so far I don't know what to think! I’d say that they are more interesting as thought-experiments than enjoyable as adventures. They’re certainly a lot ballsier than a lot of other books pitched at children (they are intended for 8-12 year olds, according to Dragon’s colour coding), and they make admirably clear that heroism or even morality are incidental to most choices human beings have had to make throughout history. No FF-style Luck penalties here for stabbing King Harold in the back…or even joining an anarchist terror group and gunning down Met policemen! That said, the fact your characters have to muddle on and make the best of events beyond their control (like 99.9999% of all human beings who have ever lived, I suppose) is never going to be as pleasurable as taking down Balthus Dire or Lord Carnuss. Still, you have give the authors props for commitment to their USP.
      Although "Thunder in the Glens" sounds like some sort of euphemism for indigestion, so they lose points for that.

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  9. Glad Book 6 proved decent - one of my favourite periods in history too so maybe I should seek this one out.

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    1. Would be interested to know what you think if you pick it up. Although I cobbled this series together years ago now, so I'm not sure how tough these are to find nowadays. Hopefully not too bad!

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  10. Pass the check and you quell the mutiny and can proceed on. Fail the check? Well, then you decide to threaten your crew with violence......and this quells the mutiny and you can proceed on.
    That brings back not-so-fond memories of one of the low points of the FF adventure Sutherland co-wrote for White Dwarf. During the first mass battle, it's possible for a major ally of yours to be among the casualties. If he doesn't fall in battle, you're fine. If he does, you must test your Luck. If you're lucky, he wasn't killed. And if you're unlucky, he managed to survive.

    All this did was lead me to an extreme case of min-maxing, because once I learned which 4 attributes required do-or-die rolls, I set all those scores to 11, and gave the remaining 3 attributes scores of 2 each, as these remaining attributes were either never tested, or they were tested but it didn't matter if you failed them.
    And this reminds me of Sutherland's The Golem of Brick Lane. To be fair, the rules make it obvious that creating a balanced character should not be your goal, but AIUI (I never found the motivation to keep playing until I got anywhere near success) the book favours one specific specialisation over all others. Apparently in Sutherlandia reporters and investigators don't need intelligence or people skills as long as they're really tough.

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    1. Ouch! Here I was hoping that I would see some improvement when I eventually get to the books from the 90's and 00's (as it doesn't look like I'm going to see it in this series. Sustained anyway). Does that mean I shouldn't be getting my hopes up?

      Your comment about the ally surviving in the White Dwarf adventure gave me a good chuckle in a "shaking my head" kind of way. It's also good to know I'm not going crazy. I've had to go back a few times and re-read the choices and sections in the books because it doesn't initially seem like it could be right. But it is.

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  11. Fabled Lands gives you a lot of sea to navigate and you have different crew qualities, size of ship etc. But there's no real ship-to-ship combat system sadly.

    Be interested to hear your views on the next one as it appears to be about the Northern Ireland Troubles which just quite frankly boggles my mind.

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    1. Ah bummer. I guess that might have been too much to expect considering all the other things I have heard you can do in Fabled Lands. Still sounds more in-depth than any other naval gamebook I have heard about though.

      Book 8 of Real Life has a pretty vague title compared to the others in the series. Looking forward to diving in tonight and seeing what it is all about!

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  12. Book 8 does seem very edgy. In a way, I'm quite impressed they went with such a daring premise.

    So seems only two of these books are worth bothering with - two more than Saga of the Demonspawn I guess!

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    1. Yeah it's up there, but I would still say Sagas of the Demonspawn and Virgin Adventure are the two worst series I have played. If the latter counts as a series with only 2 books that is.

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  13. If you take these books with a grain of salt they're somewhat enjoyable. But the historical errors in some of the books are downright laughable. In one point during "Redcoats and Minutemen," the protagonist has the opportunity to quit the whole fight and "move west to California." Uh....from my recollection of Yank history that would involve a trip of many months in 1776, not to mention that "California" was actually a Spanish viceroy at the time!

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    1. Did you happen to play book #8 by any chance? I often wonder what other gamebook players made of the subject matter with that one.

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